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Recruited to do evil

My skin has turned into a snake skin. At night I can't walk when I have to pee, I crawl like a snake does. 

I lock myself in my room at exactly 6pm and in winter I'm in the room by 5pm because it gets dark early. I hide so that my kids never see me in this condition. I thank God for my wife who's by my side and takes great care of me.

Mamazala I used to work for three Sangoma to scam people of their money. I think this might be the ancestors punishing me or someone I wronged did this to me.

Whether it's sun screeching hot or boiling hot I always have to wear long sleeve shirts with collars and long pants to hide my snake skin. It's really bad. But it doesn't itch or anything but it's scary. 

The Sangoma used to pay me money to do evil. I was unemployed and had no luck with getting a job so I had no other choice. They would give me muti and weird things such as animal tails, bones and anything that looks like witchcraft. 

I'd take those things and bury them in people's houses not to bewitch them but to make them consult at the very sangomas. After burying those things then the Sangoma would go to the house after a day or two and act like he was led to the house by ancestors. 

He would then act like ancestors are showing him that bad things are buried there then point out exactly there. He would then ask the members in that family to dig and once they find those things then he has gained new clients. 

Sometimes people would go consult at the sangomas place and I'd be asked to follow them without being noticed just so I see where they live and at night I go bury things. 

When they go back to the sangoma then he would tell them that there are things buried in their yard and tell them where. He would then give him things to do before digging out the buried things. When they dig they will obviously find something and from there on they will become loyal clients. 

I have done this for over 5 years and now I am paying the price. The Sangomas I have been working for have failed in helping me with my condition. What scares me is I might hurt my wife one day.

She refuses to leave and a part of me is really greatful for that. But sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and all I wanna do is strangle her. I crve for her blood 80% of the time.

What's even sadder is my wife didn't even know how I was making our money. I wasn't allowed to tell her because I was told whoever I tell would perish. 

I have caused sicknesses, mental disorders and so much more only for the Sangomas to get clients. Our victims never suspected a thing. I made a mistake and I am now paying a hefty price but what else could I have done. 

I had been an unemployed graduate for so many years. Please don't just nor insult me, I am already suffering as it is.