WHERE DO ALL MY SANGOMA MOM'S HUSBAND'S DISSAPEAR TO.
I wish to remain anonymous. I am a very worried daughter of a sangoma and I'm afraid by coming here I might be putting my life at risk.
Since I came across this Chanel I've related to many of the confessions here. My mom has been a sangoma for aslong as I can remember and being her child means I am automatically her assistant.
Whether I like it or not I have to help her for aslong as I still live under her roof. I also think she has done something to my life. My life is at a stagnant and she doesn't seem bothered by that.
I passed matrive exactly 18 years ago and I've never furthered my studies nor worked anywhere. I'm an adult living at home to assist my mom. When I ask her why my life is not showing any improvements or flourishing at all she always tells me that not every child born is meant to leave their parents house.
That makes me suspect that she could have done something to me so that I remain her help. I help her with a lot of things. I don't have a calling nor the gift but she has trained me all my life that now my knowledge on these is humongous.
I have never met my dad, apparently he left my mom while I was still very young. I was raised by many different step dads. It's a pattern , every five years my step dads leave my mom without a word and they all leave their belongings. None of them takes them.
We always have to burn their belongings when a new step dad moves in. My mother gets married every 5 years. Not the Western way just the cultural way. The men pay lobola and there is no celebration. It's just lobola and a goat slaughtered and that's it.
I only remember 4 of my step dad's dissapearing without trace. But my grandmother tells me that there are more including my biological dad whom I never got the chance to be raised by and another one I was apparently
.BONUS EPISODE: WHERE DO ALL MY SANGOMA MOM'S HUSBAND'S DISSAPEAR TO.
I wish to remain anonymous. I am a very worried daughter of a sangoma and I'm afraid by coming here I might be putting my life at risk.
Since I came across this Chanel I've related to many of the confessions here. My mom has been a sangoma for aslong as I can remember and being her child means I am automatically her assistant.
Whether I like it or not I have to help her for aslong as I still live under her roof. I also think she has done something to my life. My life is at a stagnant and she doesn't seem bothered by that.
I passed matric exactly 18 years ago and I've never furthered my studies nor worked anywhere. I'm an adult living at home to assist my mom. When I ask her why my life is not showing any improvements or flourishing at all she always tells me that not every child born is meant to leave their parents house.
That makes me suspect that she could have done something to me so that I remain her help. I help her with a lot of things. I don't have a calling nor the gift but she has trained me all my life that now my knowledge on these is humongous.
I have never met my dad, apparently he left my mom while I was still very young. I was raised by many different step dads. It's a pattern , every five years my step dads leave my mom without a word and they all leave their belongings. None of them takes them.
We always have to burn their belongings when a new step dad moves in. My mother gets married every 5 years. Not the Western way just the cultural way. The men pay lobola and there is no celebration. It's just lobola and a goat slaughtered and that's it.
I only remember 4 of my step dad's dissapearing without trace. But my grandmother tells me that there are more including my biological dad whom I never got the chance to be raised by and another one I was apparently too young to remember him.
Before these men dissapear they seem to not be in a good state of mind, it's like they were losing their minds somehow.
What bothers me even more is the fact that no one ever comes looking for them,it's like they have never existed. I sometimes think maybe my mom makes her own tokoloshis for her own pleasure and when she's tired she gets rid of them.
I mean how can no one ever looks for them? My mom is a very powerful sangoma and she doesn't even like talking much and that makes her none approachable.
My mother and I never hold conversations like normal kids do with their parents. Infact she treats me like a worker than her own daughter. I am on this platform because I am seeking answers Incase there's someone who might know what could be happening.
This dissapearing acts stresses me a lot and my soul knows no peace. I am actually going through a mild trauma someone save me please.
My mom is a bitter anger person naturally. She hardly laughs,smile or hold conversations. But when she's very angry she laughs out very loud and it's the kind of laugh that will make you very scared.
My grandmother, my mother's mother is now blind. She says that was due to asking my mom about the dissapearing men. Apparently my mom has made it clear to my grandmother that should she continue with annoying her with questions she's not interested in then she will follow them.
I once tried asking about my biological father and that night I had nightmares. I kept on dreaming of a strange man strangling me and the next day my mom said "the man in your dreams is your dad and he doesn't want anything to do with you". She further said keep asking more about him will lead me to my early grave.
From that day on I've never asked anything. There is an isolated hut about 100 meters from our home that no one except my mom is allowed to enter.
There are other nights when I am out of sleep I hear funny sounds of men crying and howling. I tried telling my mom countless times and she always dismisses me.
But one night after hearing the sounds I also heard my mom's voice but ofcos I couldn't ask because I don't want to get into any trouble.
I don't know what to make out of this anymore but it's very disturbing and I still say I am not at peace.
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