HOW I USED MY CHILDREN FOR MY BUSINESS TO SUCCEED.
Most people judge me when i share my experience and my mistakes. Instead of getting help I'm always crucified. I made a terrible mistake and i allowed love blind me into foolishness.
My parents divorced when i was very young. That resulted in me living with my aunt(my mom's sister). Both my grandparents from each side passed away before i was even born. If they were alive maybe i would've lived with them and life wouldn't have turned out the way that it did.
My mom's sister treated me really bad. Her children were never wrong in her eyes and i was always at family. Before moving in with my aunt i used to live with both my parents. My mom used to work as a domestic worker so that she can take care of my dad and i.
Not only that but she was also paying for my dad's fees. Obviously in her mind she thought dad would finish his studies, get a job and take care of us.
On days that i wanted something that they couldn't afford ,my mom used to comfort me by telling me just how much one day dad will be able to afford all my fantasies.
She believed in him that much. She also spoke about how she too will also go back to school and further her studies once dad starts working.
She had everything all planned and she was super excited about the future. In all honesty her world revolved around dad and i. Eventualy dad finished his studies and after a few months of job hunting he secured a job.
You guys should've seen how happy and proud my mom was. Dad started working and life looked promising. He took very good care of us until a few months later. Yoh he became a totally different man. He treated us differently and treated mom the very worst. I could see my mom slowly losing herself and becoming a victim of emotional abuse. Dad used to say the most hurtful things to my mom.
He used to brag about how women are no longer home makers but dream chasers.
Only to later find out that he was having an affair with one of his colleagues. He started sleeping out and bit by bit stopped being the provider until he eventualy stopped.My Mom did a little investigations, you know how women are and eventualy she learned about the other woman. It broke her, it destroyed her. She decided to confront my dad and all he said " the way you are an idiot it really took you long to catch on".
That's when he told her that his lawyers are busy with their divorce. My mom begged and apologised but for what i still don't know to this day. How could she apologise because he is the one that's cheating.
From that day on dad openly started seeing the other woman. He was so over his marriage with my mom.
I must have been 14 years then, i remember my mom begging him to atleast take her to school so that she can give me a better future. He said he would need to run that idea past his woman. My mom broke down completely.
She would lock herself in her room, she even stopped going to work until she eventualy lost the job.
She couldn't take it anymore and she resorted to suicide. She waited for me to go to school then she hung herself. On that day she woke up very early and she was so joyful and happy. She helped me get ready for school and she kept on reminding me just how much she loves me. She made me breakfast, made my lunchbox and also helped with tying my hair. She even walked me to the gate and kissed me goodbye. Little did i know that was the end. I was so happy to have my mom back, i was super excited even at school i couldn't wait to get home. I was expecting to find a home cooked meal and a very clean house with a happy mother.
As soon as i left i assume she went inside the house wrote a letter to my dad and left it on the table. She then went to her bedroom and hung herself. The letter she wrote to my dad read "Dear Paul i forgive you and I'll always love you, please take care of nono for me".
She didn't leave me any note. When i got home and i was met by my mom's cold body when i opened her door i screamed so hard. Anyway after mom's funeral my dad and his new woman took me in for a couple of months.
I truly suffered. The woman did not like me at all. Sometimes I'd just get lost in my thoughts and start crying. She would find me and start insulting me telling me that even if i cry my coward useless mom won't come back. She ill treated me so bad that sometimes I'd sleep with an empty stomach.
When i told my dad about this and he confronted her, she denied everything and went as far as saying i am just there to destroy their marriage. She said maybe that's the plan my mom and i had before she took her life. She said a whole lot of things if i were to say them here I'd take all day.
Anyway, that's how i ended up living with my mom's sister. My dad sent me there and would send maintenance money on a monthly basis. My aunt and mother didn't have a good relationship. Apparently my mom was the golden child making my aunt the black sheep of the family. She was a drunkard too. She would say so many hurtful things when drunk. When my dad would send money she would spend it on herself and her children. A lot happened so much that i don't want to dwell on it a lot.
I started dating older men so i can get away from my situation. I met a married taxi driver who rented me a room and took very good care of me. I was 17 and he was 43. I fell pregnant just before my 18th birthday with a baby boy. He continued treating me well. When i turned 20 i fell pregnant with twins and that's when his wife found out about me and all hell broke lose. I didn't even know he was married. He lied to me and told me that his wife passed away and his kids are still grieving so he doesn't want to disturb their healing journey by taking me home because it would feel to them like he was replacing their mom too quick. I stupidly belived him because not once did his wife ever called when i was with him. He would go everywhere with me and show me off and not once has anyone ever said anything about his wife.
They came together to my room to break up with me. He broke up with me infront of his wife and told me to find my kids father because those were not his. His wife even beat me up telling me how much i am just a baby with an old and scrap vagina.
I didn't fight back because i was unsure if this was really happening or it was just a sick prank. It took me a while to digest this.
Month end came and rent was due. I had no money or even a plan. We had ran out of food yoh my kids were suffering. A lot was going on in my mind at that point. My landlord was an older man and since i had a fettish for old men i decided i was going to seduce him so that i can maybe skip paying rent. He was really old and i must say lonely or atleast that's what i thought.
Trying to seduce him was the worst mistake of my life. He called me all sorts of names and chased my kids and i out with immediate effect.
Because i couldn't pay rent for that month he kept a few of my appliances so he can recover the unpaid amount of rent. It was dark and a bit cold outside and my kids were crying because of hunger and the cold.
I decided that the only safe place would be the police station. It was just a walk away so we walked. My kids at that point were frustrating and annoying me. Since their dad decided to abandon me, i grew some kind of hate towards my children. As innocent as they were i wished i never had them. We walked to the police station and luckily we found a very kind police man who assisted us.
He made us tea with bread and gave us blankets from the waiting cell to keep us warm. Ofcourse i had to share my story with all the police who were there working night shift. They sympathised with us but the police women there threw a few jabs of judgemnents but i ignored them.
There was this one police man that we found at the desk who was extremely nice. He then advised me to go live with friends or family members or else I'd be demonstrated with my kids. He explained how social workers would take away the kids from me.
Deep down that's what i wanted but couldn't tell him because he had mistaken me for a loving mom. I told him how we have no family nor anywhere to go and begged him to help us. At first he said his hands were tied and he sadly couldn't help us. I started crying and that's when i told him that i would be fine with the social workers taking my kids because i did not want them anyway.
Just by saying those words i could see from his reaction that he suddenly grew an interest to help us. He came closer to me and whispered.
" tomorrow morning i am knocking off at 7am, you and the kids should leave this place around 6am and tell the other officers that you are taking the kids to their father's place, then wait for me miles from here and when i knock off I'll pick you guys up. I might have a very comfortable new home for you guys".
The morning came and i woke my kids up and we followed the plan. Six o'clock we left the police station and we waited for the officer miles away from the station. He came around eight, just as i was starting to think that he tricked me into leaving the building with my kids. But finaly he arrived. We got into the car and he explained how he had to make sure the night shift officers were gone first.
We got into the car and he drove us to a very big mansion. I was shocked and asked who's house that was and he said it was his and that he lives alone so there is plenty of rooms for the kids and i. I was so excited, felt like i had won the lottery. Could this mean that the God that i have been doubting was finaly answering my prayers.
We got into the house and he showed us the bathrooms and gave us towels and changing clothes. These were women and children clothes. When he gave them to us he explained how they belonged to hia wife and kids. He said he was married with two kids a boy and a girl. But sadly his kids died in a car accident and a couple of weeks later his wife left him. She apparently accused him of being the one responsible for the children's death. I jumped up with shock when he mentioned that remembering his sudden change of heart and facial expression when i told him that i didn't want the kids anymore. He quickly said the reason for her accusations was because i was the one driving the car when the accident happened.
That kind of put me at ease a bit and so him and became closer and closer with each day passing by. We ended up dating. He took care of my kids and i so well.
One day he came back from work and picked me up from the mansion. He had said he wanted to show me something very dear to his life. He took me to a mortuary. He told me that that's his father's legacy and his dad told him that it will only be a success if he finds true love.
He told me that business has been very slow and this might lead to him losing everything. This includes the cats and mansion. He looked very sad and that hurt me. I asked if there was anything i could do to help him and he said i probably wouldn't agree to it. It was the first time i dated a guy who isn't much older than me, he was just 3 years older and it was also the first time i felt the way i was feeling about him.
I mean even if he were to lose everything I'd still be with him. That's how strongly i felt about him. I saw him shed a tear and that broke my heart. I went closer to him and hugged me, i also shed tears because his pain was my pain.
I then offered to help and i said i would do anything to help. He suddenly let go of me from the tight hug and looked me straight in the eye and asked me if i meant that and i nodded. He hugged me again and thanked me. He then said i will take you somewhere tomorrow that is where we will get the help.
I agreed and we went home happily. Tomorrow came and he took me to see a Nigerian witch doctor. I've never in my life been that confused. He told me all will be fine and no matter what happens we will always have each other. I was inlove so those words gave me all the comfort i needed.
We went into the hut of the sangoma and there was no one there...he told me it was a Nigerian witch doctor but i didn't see him until we left. The hut was very dark i inside so i could hardly see anything.
But i heard voices and i was holding his hands super tight through out the session. They spoke in a language i didn't understand but he translated to me where he needed me to hear and understand. He asked me if i wanted to pay revenge to my baby daddy and i was confused because we had agreed that is a chapter we would never re open. I asked to leave because i was very scared and annoyed by this. Suddenly it was quiet and we left.
As soon as we stepped out it was only then that i could see his face. He was very very angry. We went into the car and he told me that when we get home my kids and i should leave his house. Wow, what a shocker! I asked him why and he said he can't continue feeding another man's kids with his small salary while the dad is out there balling. He said it was too much for him plus he has a lot of stress from his family legacy so he doesn't need anymore stress.
I felt bad and begged and apologised and he said he will only forgive me if we go back to the hut and concerned to whatever is asked of me. Love being blind i agreed.
We then went back and i agreed to paying revenge to my baby daddy and i was told that the only pain he will feel is if he comes back one day and finds that his children are no more. They convinced me that I'll still be able to see them in their next life but the father of my kids won't be able to and that will destroy him. He will feel the pain that he made me feel ten times more and he and his wife will start quarreling.
I agreed and so we were then given muti. We had to drink that muti so that i was officiated as part of the family. I was told that the muti will also give me powers to still connect to my children even in the next life.
I honestly understood what was being said in there after drinking the muti. I just agreed to everything because had i not then my kids and i would be chased out and we had nowhere to go. I also did not want to make the man i loved angry again. I understood very well that i had just sacrificed my kids.
When we got home it was quiet and awkward between us. I couldn't believe what I've just done. Before i got out of the car he held my hand tightly and said thank you for this. And i didn't say anything i just stepped out of the car and the minute i stepped down i became dizzy. He was already standing by my door, so he knew that I'd be feeling this way. He picked me up and i faintly heard my kids asking what was wrong with me when we got inside the house and i heard him saying i drank too many glasses of wine at our date. From there on i don't know what happened.
I remember waking up the next morning laying with my back against the floor and being naked. It looked like i was surrounded by black candles as i could see that they burnt out. I think i also had a dream whereby i had my kids screaming. I got up very quickly and looked for my clothes, when i passed by the mirror i saw a tattoo on my body it was a weird drawing that looked like it had a lot of evil in it.
I dressed up and went downstairs to look for my babies and i found them watching T.V. with the man while having snack. My kids looked happy. They were very fond of the man and their happiness reminded me a lot of my mom's happiness on her last day. I snapped out of it and they ran to hug me when they saw me. I was barefoot which is something I'd never do. I had a phobia of walking barefooted and my kids were surprised that I'm always yelling at them to wear shoes and today i was the one not wearing the shoes. By the way my first born was 9 and the girls were 7.
Whenever i tried wearing shoes I'd feel my feet burning so i had to walk barefooted. Even the man was always barefooted unless he was wearing his work uniform.
A couple of months later just as i was starting to think that i misunderstood the mission because my kids were well and alive i found my kids floating in the swimming pool. They had drowned. I was alone in the house and i woke up to such a disturbing sight. I called for help and the police and paramedics came and declared them dead. I was in so much pain started regretting and wished that i had left his house and saved my kids but it was already too late for such thoughts now.
We buried my kids and to my suprise a month later he called me to an empty room inside the house. He said that was a sacred house and no one should ever enter except him and i. He then closed the door and it suddenly became very dark and i saw my kids sitting at the corner of the room looking dirty, tired and hungry. He then said only we can see them, they were at the witch doctor's hut for training. They will bring us a lot of money and i will treat you like the queen that you are. You've saved my family company with your womb and I'll forever be grateful. I will give you the life that you deserve and more.
Every night just after midnight the kids will go out to get us clients and that will be our wealth. Don't ever call them by name or you'll confuse and make them weak. They are now angels of death. They will go out there to cause deaths and the clientele will grow.
Don't try to bath or feed them. They are now like wild animals and they will hunt for their own food they are no longer your children. My kids looked at me with sad faces, they were very pale and had snots and dried up tears and spots of blood on their dirty clothes.
From that day on i started isolating myself from the man, he forced me to run the company which was indeed booming. He kept on reminding me that even if i try to go to the police station nothing will change the situation because the law does not work with such cases plus post mortem has shown that my kids died from drowning so i had no case. They will book me into a psychatric ward instead and see me as a mental case. Then i would die, he said my own kids will kill me for breaking the oath made to the dark world.
I saw my kids almost everyday until i couldn't stand it anymore. I had to run to a nearby church for help and that's where I'm currently getting the protection. Although i can see that they also think i Maybe have trauma because i sometimes see my kids there and scream but when they come there's no one.
My pastor adviced me to share my story on this plattform saying that maybe i will get help a lot faster here since you guys deal with such traumas. I hope that man doesnt see this and come for me.
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