Being desperate for marriage can be a very big problem most times. I fell pregnant when I was just 16 and I was blessed with a daughter. Where I come from once you have a baby before marriage then you are no longer good enough for any many.
This also includes the guy who got you pregnant. The society will overlook the fact that he impregnated you and you will be blamed for everything. I was seen as the lose girl that fell pregnant without marriage,I was an abomination.
Even my own father disowned me but my mother stood by me. She supported me and that led to her marriage being over. My dad threw the both of us out and we went back to my grandmother's house. I honestly felt so bad and I blamed myself for everything but my mother told me to focus on school and leave everything else to God.
My mother took care of my daughter for me while I was at school repeating my grade 10. The minute the school found out I was pregnant I was suspended till I gave birth. I gave birth in December and started afresh the following year. Still I was not liked or accepted. I was isolated,I sat alone at the very back of the class because no one wanted to be associated with an abomination.
I passed my grade 10 with flying colours. Our school had that top 10 students for every class announcement at assembly. I was a part of the grade 10 top achievers but my principal called me aside before they made the announcement. He told me that my name will not be called out for obvious reasons so I should even go to assembly but remain in class.
I didn't even get my award but who was i to complain? My daughter was also growing into the most beautiful girl I've ever seen and I loved her whole heartedly. My mom helped me heal from everything and she taught me how to love and cherish my daughter for she was a blessing from God.
My dad on the other hand had cut us off completely. He ended up marrying my mom's bestfriend. My mom pretended to be okay with everything,I mean she tried to be strong for my child and I but I could see that she was falling apart. I blamed myself but she wouldn't let me take the blame.
I dedicated and committed myself to books so that I can give my mom and my daughter a better life. I just wanted to do so well at school,study medicine and secure a good job then get my mom and kid out of that toxic place. Unfortunately my mom passed away during mid year exams the following year when I was doing grade 11. That meant I had to quit school because I had no one to look after my kid when I was at school.
It was very painful but I had to. What's worse was that my dad refused to be a part of the funeral and only 10 People attended my mom's funeral. No one was there for me. Just like me my mom was an only child. I quit school and started a business of selling onions and tomatoes. Biggest mistake of my life.
No one wanted to buy from me so I ran at a loss. Life became extremely hard and I cried myself to sleep every night. My daughter was all I had and I was grateful for her existence even under the circumstances. Hunger was our portion.
I ended up throwing myself at this very old man who lived not far from my grandmother's house. He was 36 years older than me and he lived alone his whole life or rather for aslong as I can remember. When I seduced him the plan was to get him to look after my kids while I go back to school or him paying creche fee for my child.
If only I knew that he was going to use us as his tokoloshis I would have persevered the hunger at home with my child. That man was more evil than anyone I've ever known. He has always had rumours that he was a witch but I honestly didn't believe those rumours until I witnessed everything.
He lived alone in a big house and there were rooms that were always locked and I was told never to go anywhere near them. I was told to cook with a huge pot which made enough food for 20 people but there was only three of us including my daughter. I'd dish only for my daughter and I per his instructions and he would always dish for himself.
He used to eat very late around 1 Am and that's why i never dished out for him. What was weird was that the next morning when we woke up the pots would be empty and sparkling clean. I found that odd but I had learnt to never ask questions so I'd just keep quiet. Luckily he used to pay for my daughter's creche fee and I went back to school.
As time went by,when I was in matric he would wake us up in the middle of the night. He would tell us to take of all our clothes and be left with nothing then smeared us with Muti all over our head,body and faces. Then he would give us a black powder to eat then tell us to go to people's homes and when we get there by their front doors we must poop and leave.
It became an every night thing. In some houses we couldn't enter as we would feel burning sensations all over our bodies and we would end up relieving ourselves at their gates. I don't even want to talk about how I ended up agreeing to marrying such a man.
My daughter eventually became mentally ill because of everything that was happening. She saw his things that she wasn't supposed to see in one of the locked rooms and that's how she became mentally ill. I had to have the courage to walk away and moved back into my grandmother's house.
I failed my matric and I never went back. My daughter is still not a hundred percent but she's getting better. We are still being followed by his things that we can't even explain and we get tortured but coarse salt has been our fighter. I take my daughter to St John church and that's where we also get our protection from that evil man.
Social Plugin